Is it bad

IS IT BAD.......   BY Angela Helene Summers
Is it bad that am always the one who understanding ,
the one that give more chances  then should be given
or that am one that no longer believe  in what anyone say they do
till they do it cause most often not they always never do what they say they do
so I am left behind in thing or forgotten.
AM I just a invisible  person
no one notice  me unless I am no longer there for their needs ?
I know I try to be a decent person
I am not perfect lward knows that .
I am quick to get angry but fast to forgive too .
I try to go out my way to help those who need it .
I love passionately  and very fierce ,
am slow to be hating someone or hold a grudge 
but when I do it stay for awhile I forgive but I won't forget.
I know people walk all over me but I try to be the bigger person and no be shady like they are to me.
I don't understand  how people can be this way.
If I could honestly  I run off to some place with no people for at least 100 mile around
just have my Internet, my books ,my computer along with food and my dogs I be happier ..
it to the point now I am getting where I don't even wanna be around anyone am tired of being used ,
tired of being the one who always understanding , 
am tired of being disappointed 
cause no one can  ever say what they mean or mean what they promise
they can talk the talk but never walk the walk ...
SERIOUSLY if I was to be gone one day say tomorrow
can ANY OF U that say that is my friend or family honestly 
would know I was gone or miss me except  for what I can do for u
but just truly miss me for me for who I am as a person a friend a family member  and WHY? 
Why would u and don't give me the standard crap everyone always say
we love u shit cause if that was so then u would if notice something was wrong to begin with
instead u didn't notice and no it too late ....
You see it is bad that I am always understanding one
or the one that give to many chances
and it extremely  bad I don't believe in what anyone say they do
and worst off I am invisible  to u and everyone around u
( ever stop to wonder why I do the things I do like dyeing my hair different colors or piercing even tattoos
hell even down to the way I dress or talk....
hmm got ya thinking now didn't I now u never know)
now what a shame is when it to late some of u will realized what happen what went wrong but
unfortunately  most of u will blame me for being gone and say it was my fault I was treated like this
I ask for it etc etc etc ..
and u know what it all wrong!!!!
Some will be mine own and in that I take responsibility 
but for the most part it is you all who is all fault
society in a whole  fault for the was we r now...
and what even worse of a shame
is no one will remember who I truly was
and as the days go on something  will grab ur attention 
and I be truly forgotten 
never to exist in anyone mind
a floating thought that once was but now a distance  memory  if it even can be called that...........
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